Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark
by LoveAndCoughDrops
Summary: “And anyways, L doesn’t drink blood, he eats cake!” Near knows that Matt and Mello love a good ghost story. *New title, new summary! Formerly "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night"*


Author's Note: Y'know, I'd been planning on getting this published quite some time ago. At least a week ago was my original drop-date for this fic. Buuut, a lot can happen in a week, and believe me a lot did XD I should be getting back on schedule soon though, and next up for Death Note is a few more one shots and some supercoolbrandnew multi-chapters. Yayy!

Enjoy ^^

* * *

"…..and attached to the door handle, was a HOOK." Matt's smile was smug as he sat back to look at the others' awed expressions.

"That story, was the biggest crock of bullshit I've ever heard." Mello remarked.

"Oh yeah? Well you looked pretty scared!" Matt shot back.

"Only because you're the only person dumb enough to believe that's _true, _numb nuts!"

"You're _mom_ thought it was true when I told it to her, brain freeze!"

"My mom's dead, you ass!"

Mello glowered at Matt, who clearly wasn't sure how to respond to the retort. Near had been sitting quietly on Matt's bed while the boys sparred, but now he cleared his throat and they both looked over at him with curious expressions.

"I believe it is _my _turn to tell a scary story." Near told them, twirling a piece of hair around his fingers. Matt and Mello fell back onto the cushions on the floor they had vacated and stared at their pajama-clad yarn-spinner attentively. The wind howling outside Wammy's House rattled against the windows, creating the perfect atmosphere for a night of ghostly tales in Mello's room. Near began in a soft voice:

"Have either of you ever heard of dracs?" Mello shook his head so hard, his rosary smacked Matt in the face. "A drac is a type of vampire. They're Parisian, and they are the residents of centuries-old kingdoms beneath the river Seine. Dracs can change their shape, and though they most often wait on the banks of the Seine and drag people under, they are capable of leaving the river to hunt if it's necessary. In the early nineteenth century, a young girl, for the sake of the story let's call her-"

"Zelda!" Matt cried.

"Zelda! What kind of a dumbass name is that?" sneered Mello. Matt's posture turned defensive.

"_Zelda _just so _happens _to be the name of the beautiful princess Link is trying to rescue in my video game."

"I've heard better names for a princess in those stupid pretend games Linda and them play in the drawing room! _They _give princesses names like Gloriana and, and _Leia_ and things like that!"

"Yes, but Linda and them are dumb, ugly girls who don't know the first thing about princesses, Mello, and you're stupid for listening to them in the first place!"

Standing up in the middle of the blanket fort Roger had constructed for their sleepover, Mello looked even more terrifying in his fury. His head brushed the top of the old quilt that made up the roof, making him appear to be a towering giant. Just as he was about to launch a scathing reply at Matt, Near cut him off, effectively saving Matt for the second time in half an hour.

"It doesn't matter what a good name is for a princess, because the girl in my story is just a tailor's daughter. And _I'm _going to name her. Her name was Claire."

Matt and Mello muttered about Near's choice of name, but chose to allow him to continue rather than argue the point.

"SO one day Claire went down to the river to do her family's laundry. While she was in the middle of scrubbing her father's underwear, she saw something glittering beneath the water's surface. It was a gold necklace, beset with rubies and emeralds and all sorts of valuable jewels. She ran over to where the necklace floated, and just as she reached into the water to grab it, a hand shot up and snatched her!" At this point in the story, Near lunged forward causing Matt to yelp and scatter the M&M's he'd been just about to put in his mouth. The begoggled redhead crawled around, tearfully attempting to pick up the candies while Mello and Near collapsed in a fit of giggles. They were both breathless when Roger opened the door and poked his head in.

"What's going on in here you three? I've heard an awful lot of commotion coming from this room." Roger always tried his hardest to look stern, especially when Mello was involved, but he knew he was no disciplinarian as far as the children were concerned. Mello's eyes sparkled with barely-suppressed mirth as Near told Roger in that innocent way of his that everything was fine, and they would keep the noise to a minimum. Roger left looking unconvinced. As soon as the door clicked shut again, Mello turned to Matt with a serious look on his face.

"Now Matt, it's really very rude of you to keep stealing Near's spotlight, so I'm going to have to ask you to stop interrupting the story."

"But I-"

"Shhhhhh." Mello shushed. Matt sighed in exasperation, but motioned for Near to continue.

"Claire was dragged down through the depths of the Seine, to one of the dracs' underwater kingdoms. A nobleman drac made her his kids' nanny. She worked for the drac for seven years, until one day he let her leave for the surface once again. When she got back to Paris, she hadn't aged at all. Her family was really happy to have her back at home, and didn't ask where she'd been all that time."

"What the hell kinda parents are they?! Their kid disappears for seven years and they don't even wanna know where she was?" Mello was in complete disbelief.

"Or why she didn't call?" Matt put in.

"Or write?"

"I'm not done yet! And at the rate you two keep offering commentary, I may never finish!" This was the closest Near had ever come to raising his voice in his entire life. It figured that Matt and Mello would be the cause.

"Sorry, Near," they said in unison, "you can finish now." Matt scooted closer to Mello's sleeping bag. Near sighed, and once again launched into what happened next.

"A few years after she resurfaced, Claire's parents sent her to the marketplace to get a few things, and- yes, they DID send her to the market alone, even after her ordeal, and yes, I KNOW that was irresponsible parenting in your eyes, but it was the 1800's, Mello, _they were all bad parents back then- _while Claire was at the market she saw her drac ex-employer trying to lure a girl away from a fruit stand. She quickly ran over and swept him into a hug. She asked him how the children had been, and his wife, and the kingdom. He answered her questions, but still looked confused the whole time they were speaking. Finally, Claire asked him why he seemed perturbed. The drac told her that he simply wondered how she had managed to see through the many layers of glamour he had disguised himself in before coming to the market. Claire told him that once when she'd been feeding his children their lunch, she had accidentally rubbed her right eye while her finger had some eel pastry on it. When she had come back to the surface, she could still see the dracs for what they really were, but only through her right eye. The drac smiled and told her that was very curious…and then he ripped out her right eye. He pulled her into an alley and tore her body to pieces. Once she was dead and his lips were smeared with her blood, the drac popped her eye into his mouth and sucked on it like a grape as he headed back to the river with a bag full of her limbs to feed to his family."

Near gnawed on a licorice whip and waited for the other inhabitants of the fort to give their comments on the ending of Claire's story. Matt's eyes were wide and his mouth gaped open. Mello's half-eaten chocolate bar had been abandoned.

"Wow Near, that was probably one of the most sadistic endings I've ever heard, and I've heard some pretty fucked-up shit." This was to be considered high praise coming from Mello. Matt's face hadn't lost its horrified expression.

"Was that story…I mean…did that actually happen Near?" Sometimes Mello wondered how Matt had ended up in an orphanage for exceedingly bright children. Maybe he'd been smart at one point and then Mortal Kombat had rotted his brain cells.

"Of course it didn't actually happen you dope," Mello scoffed "can you honestly imagine a bunch of evil mer-pires or whatsitcalleds running around Paris, draining people dry and kidnapping new nannies for their kids? You really need to stop playing video games if you think that's plausible."

"Oh, fuck you Mello! Just because you don't believe in dracs doesn't mean they aren't real. The world doesn't need your permission to spin. And besides, I was asking Near!" Matt turned expectantly to Near and waited for an answer.

Near's mouth was set in a thoughtful line, and he was twirling his favorite piece of hair. He was in the position Linda had dubbed his "thinking pose."

"There's maybe a five percent chance the supernatural world exists Matt, so I suppose there's also a five percent chance that dracs exist. If dracs existed, they would be perfectly capable of disguising themselves and living among us; consequently, it wouldn't exactly be easy to know if we saw one. Dracs, much like other vampires, are undead, and therefore don't sleep, so by my estimation, a drac disguised as a human would have the pallor and under-eye bags of a very exhausted individual. And of course, a drac would need to live near a source of water in order to moisten their skin every few days. Does that answer your question adequately, Matt?"

The horror had been banished from Matt's face, and in its place rested an intent and concentrated look.

"L is a drac."

Mello gaped and then burst out laughing.

"I'm serious! Near, stop grinning like an idiot, this is for real! Think about it, L is pale and he's got big circles under his eyes, and when have either of you ever seen him sleep? And-MELLO WOULD YOU SHUT THE HELL UP FOR JUST A SECOND AND LISTEN?!"

The blond continued shaking with laughter while he held up his middle finger. Near fiddled with a toy soldier and tried to hide his amusement. Matt frowned at them both.

"If you two geniuses think you're sooo good at deducing things, give me one good reason why L _isn't_ a drac."

"Because, Matt, dracs don't exist! And even if there was undeniable proof of their existence, _L still isn't one._ L is an insomniac workaholic which is why we've never seen him sleep, and you'd be freakishly pale too if you never went outside." Mello wore his trademark look of smug certainty, while Near remained quiet and considerate.

Matt didn't look convinced. Mello began to lose some of his swagger under Matt's scrutinizing gaze. He struggled for a second, searching for a suitable third point to his argument before finally deciding to go with

"And anyways, L doesn't drink blood, he eats cake!"

Near pointed out that he had never said the dracs only drank blood. "Much like vampires, they do need blood to survive, but, unlike land vampires, dracs can subsist on food while consuming blood only semi-regularly."

Mello reached for his chocolate bar and crunched down on it. Near's statement had left him looking somewhat shaken. Matt smirked. He had almost brought Mello around to his side and it felt good to win.

After a healthy dose of cacao, Mello turned to Matt with hardened resolve.

"If you two twits are seriously speculating on L's status as a member of this undead, underwater species of predator, you're going to need cold, hard evidence before you can reach a conclusion." he informed them calmly.

Near and Matt, being first and third in line respectively as L's successors, were good at making deductions, and had therefore already figured out where Mello's train of thought was headed. Rather than derail it, they both jumped on board.

Near's voice was just as calm as Mello's when he responded: "Are you suggesting we go spy on L in the hopes of getting some tangible proof?"

Mello nodded. Matt pumped his fist in the air and cheered.

The three young detectives grabbed everything they thought they would need on their surveillance mission and crept through Wammy's House to L's room.

* * *

L Lawliet had just finished taking a shower. He emerged from the bathroom and, clad only in a white towel, stood and contemplated his image in the mirror that hung above his chest of drawers. Mirrors had only begun to bother him after investigations had taken over his life. He disliked being able to see the toll each case took on his body. It was only during one of his most optimistic moments that he had chosen to keep a mirror in his sleeping quarters.

Taking the word 'sleeping' very lightly, mind you.

L stared at his glassy counterpart. The soggy stranger stared right back. L ruffled his hair to shake loose some of the water droplets in lieu of brushing it. With the thick black mass of hair no longer slicked back against his head, he felt his reflection seemed more familiar to him.

A knock sounded at the door. The wide-eyed detective pulled his towel tighter around his waist before granting the source of the knock entrance. Normally he would've gotten up to see who it was rather than simply say 'come in,' but, call it a shortcoming, the world's greatest detective just didn't believe any harm could befall him in the place he'd grown up feeling so safe. Quillish Wammy, the House proprietor trundled in with a tea cart. Wammy smiled upon seeing evidence that L had been in the shower.

"It's nice to see you doing things to take care of yourself every once in a while Lawliet." the older man said.

"Yes, I realized it had been at least five days since I last bathed and felt it would be a good idea, lest my smell begin to precede me into rooms."

Wammy chuckled and set down a tray laden with tea and assorted pastries. He gestured to one of the cakes.

"Linda and Near made strawberry shortcake for you earlier. I thought you might enjoy a piece with your nighttime tea." L's eyes alighted on the cake.

"Your deductive reasoning skills are most impressive, Watari-san."

"While you're already on a roll with your hygiene L, perhaps you could consider sleeping for a bit tonight?" Wammy pressed gently. He was always afraid that one day the young man would collapse from exhaustion.

"I'll try Watari-san. Thank you for bringing up my tea."

Quillish Wammy smiled warmly then bowed out of the room. The door shut behind him with a gentle _click._

* * *

Unbeknownst to him, Wammy walked right by L's top three successors on his way back down to his study. Matt, Mello, and Near waited until the echo of footsteps on the hardwood died down before beginning the process of untangling themselves from their cramped hiding place.

"Dammit! Near get your bony albino ass off of my shoulder!" Mello hissed.

"I am attempting to do just that, Mello. However, Matt's decidedly unpleasant-smelling underarm needs to remove itself from my face before I can begin to extract my 'bony albino ass' from your shoulders."

"My pits smell bad? Huh, that's weird. I put on deodorant today. Ouch! What the hell, Mello did you just bite me?!"

"No Matt," Mello said evenly "I didn't bite you. Your desperately flailing hand just so happened to smack me in the teeth, and I just so happened to clamp down. _Now would you kindly get the fuck out of this corner so Near and I can do the same?_"

After much wriggling of torsos and gnashing of teeth, all three boys tumbled out of the corner they had so expertly chosen for their hiding spot.

"Now," Mello whispered "if we intend to see into L's room and figure out if he's a drac, we need to attach this knife to a really thin stick and poke it under the door and hope-"

"Or we could just open the door really quietly and look for any suspicious behavior." Matt offered.

Near nodded. "There's elegance in the simplicity of Matt's plan."

Mello rolled his eyes. "You two have no flair for the dramatic" he muttered.

This time Matt was in the lead as they silently made their way to L's bedroom on all fours. Mello sulked. He couldn't believe he was genuinely allowing Matt to lead him on this idiotic escapade to unmask their hero as a supernatural being. Mello was so caught up in his internal monologue, he didn't hear Near's whispered warning to stop moving. Mello crawled head-first into Matt's slender, jeans-covered behind.

Near made a choked noise that sounded suspiciously like a giggle. Mello jolted up onto his knees, his eyes wide. He could feel the heat rising to his cheeks and turned around to snarl at Near, but Matt shushed him quickly.

"If you make too much noise, Mello, our cover will be blown."

Mello opened his mouth with the intention of telling them both to piss off, thought better of it, and closed his mouth again. Matt smiled at him appreciatively and rose to his knees as well. All three knelt in front of L's door. Matt turned the doorknob…

…they peeked inside.

L was standing up with his back to them when they first opened the door, but at the slight _chink_ sound of the doorknob he turned his head so they could see his face in profile. There was something red at the corner of his mouth. Matt squeaked in horror and Near quickly clamped a white sleeve over his own mouth. Mello stared, transfixed. He couldn't believe it.

It was indubitable that there was blood staining Lawliet's cheek a grotesque color. Mello was shocked. Matt had been right.

"He's a drac" Mello whispered, horrified by the discovery.

L turned quickly at Mello's words so that he was facing the door. The thunder of young boys stampeding away from the room could be heard throughout the house. He walked over to the door and quietly opened it the rest of the way, but the only clue as to who had been outside the door was a flash of white pajamas disappearing down the staircase.

The world's greatest detective licked off the sticky, red shortcake topping that had been staining his mouth and wondered what had possessed Near, Matt, and leather-loving Mello to become peeping toms. He came to no conclusions in his musings and eventually decided that some mysteries are best left unsolved.


End file.
